Ok, thatz it....

Fuck the bullshit
I can't take this anymore. Somethingz gotta give
I've put up with their shit and everything for way too long. For the most part, i've been able to deal with it. It only getz real bad every once in a while, and then everythingz kool for a bit
But this time
They've pushed me too far. A person can only take so much before they snap and i've reached my limit. The fucking hell they put me through, the bullshit excusez and reasonz they try to feed me, all in the name of being my parentz, i'm done with it
I'm sick of it. What the fuck they think, or who they hell they think they are i don't know and i don't give a damn anymore
Honestly, i couldn't give a fuck about them anymore. I wish they would jus keel over and die right now
According to their stupid fucking beliefz, they're supposedly going to heaven
bullshit
Hell soundz too good for the two of those assholes
Why they think they can get away with this shit, and i'm jus gonna take it, is beyond me
But no more
They don't want to trust me, fine. I'll give them a fucking reason not to
I'm tired of sitting back and taking it
And that goes for everybody and everything
If you think that i'm jus gonna sit back and let you get away with anything you want, wrong. I don't give a damn who you are or anything
This ends now

Say goodbye

As we dance with the devil tonight

Don't you dare look at him in the eyes

As we dance with the devil tonight

Hmmmm

Sometimez what we need

Is to open our eyez and see

What a fucking travesty this is

How we are so consumed in me

Salvation's dying..........

Somebody's crying.........

so maybe i'm paying attention more now, but the world around me is quite interesting.

i'll even go as far as to say beautiful.

itz kool how thingz can seem to be absolute chaos around us, but when the smoke finally clearz, it blowz us away................

and as if to prove how random my mind is, i completely lost that thought.

damn

but yeah, even though i try to keep this as updated as possible, i could never possibly keep up with the pace that my life moves.

this has become my outlet, my way to make sure i haven't completely lost my mind

now, this is once again way off subject, but another absolute-there have been way to many times i'll get into my practicing for a while, and then i'll stop for a bit again.

enough of that

i'm throwing myself headlong into my music. i have had way too much inspirationg and reason to not be doing this already. granted, my locale is not the best place to foster my type of music, since most everyone is very narrow-minded. but i'm determined. i'll find people to work with, and if not, i'll do it myself

so yeah

storming these gates of hell

i find myself wondering

who will be standing beside me.........

We Real Cool

The Pool Players
Seven at the Golden Shovel

We real cool. We
Left school. We

Lurk late. We
Strike straight. We

Sing sin. We
Thin gin. We

Jazz june. We
Die soon

Like Bringing A Knife To A Gun Fight

wow. this is fun
not jus this, but life in general. idk, maybe some you of would argue with me, but the factz can't be denied.
itz kinda funny to think about though. i mean, i regret to say, i used to be one of those emo kidz. yeah, i said it. bite me =P
it was a rough time in my life. for a longer time than that, i was very suicidal. it was jus too much to handle.
but a lot has changed since then
most importantly, i've found friendz. not the type that are fun to hang out with and thatz all. but friendz that are really there for me. help me through my bad timez and celebrate with me when thingz go right.
without them, i prolly would have given up long before now.
if you know me, you already know i'm prolly not the greatest influence in the world. i have more than my fair share of faultz and shit, but thatz not stopping me anymore.
i'm gonna be the best
no other way around it. call me self-centered or conceited, but if your familiar with me, itz very believable.
sometimez i've wondered why i turned out the way i did. i used to loathe and hate myself for it, but now i realize it is for a reason. i might hurt people, which i do a lil too often, but in the end it turnz out good.
so, for all that nonsense, i guess all i'm really trying to say is....

try and stop me now bitches

And From The Ashes......

....the phoenix will rise.....

so lately things have been a lil crazy for me. if you know anything about me, nothing in my life is easy or calm. i've come to terms with that. but these last two months have nearly ruined me completely. way too much shit has been coming up, and itz been a lot to carry. thankfully i've had my friends here for me, and they've helped me so much. i prolly wouldn't be here if it weren't for them.

in the end though, i realized that i couldn't put off thinking about some of it forever. thatz why i've made a decision. and i'm going to live with it, for better and worse no matter what happens. i've been through hell and back again, so i know i'm strong enough. some people may get upset with me, but if they want to talk about it, you are more than welcome to. i'll explain it all to you, but don't get the idea that you'll be able to change my mind. it took me long enough to decide already.

once again, i'm starting a new chapter in my life. this last one is about to close, and it has been something else. a lot of highs, jus as equally many lows, and all sorts of in betweens.

itz too soon to tell how this one will be, but i am in charge this time.

i'm the author of my life

the fire may destroy everything you see before you

but it is necessary

to rebuild something beautiful

A New Chapter......and cats???

ok, so fair warning-most of these are gonna be completely random, with no point at all. some will have a point or purpose, but then again, who knows? jus kind of a way for me to catch a small portion of all the thoughtz that run through my head

now, this one does have a point. a very weird one, but itz still a point.
the other night while lying in bed, i was thinking (like i do WAY too often) and it got weird. i mean, here's the thing-i love cats. all felines really. i jus find them easier to get along with than dogs.
bleh
of course, my mind had to run with that. i started wondering about what a certain somebody said about how i'm like a cat. so i started thinking....
(supposedly) i laugh like a cat
i yawn like a cat, mouth wide open, long drawn out yawn
i stretch like a cat
i can go from dead asleep to full speed in zero time flat
like cats, i'm jus as happy curling up alone as i am with someone else
ever notice how cats generate a lot of heat, especially when right against you? yeah, i do that too
i like to jump on things/people and surprise them =)
i (usually) land on my feet
seafood is amazing!!!
don't really like dogs
i am mos def a nocturnal person....feline...whatever
my curiosity will be my downfall
rubbing my back will get you the closest damn thing to a purr
even though i'm muscular, i have a very small, lithe frame
(supposedly, by the same person that mentioned my laugh) i stand cat-like

so yeah...think what you will