Sixpence

roughly58hourzandstillanother12intheleasttogo

fortheplaceziamdestinedonlyafewwillknow

this taste i cant shake it from my mouth. itz the combination of the fruity sweetness of articial flavoring added the bitter aftertaste of unnatural ingredientz and the rancid filth of addiction. do i have an addiction yes i do. i have more than one honestly but they range in severity. i do not give a fuck what you are giving up an addiction is a bitch no matter what the hell it is. especially if it is any type of substance or chemical natural or otherwise. you put yourself through the withdrawalz and you will hate yourself for giving in to an addiction in the first place. but that is only if you beat it. otherwise you will regard yourself a stupid idiot for trying to overcome an addiction like that when you yourself have grown soft in the uneeded necessitiez of the modern world. sadly though there are more addictionz out there than most people would like to acknowledge or even attempt to fathom. but just for a brief moment imagine think of every single thing you do. normal everyday activitiez. thingz that become almost pure muscle memory because it no longer requirez any thought just the movement. now picture just the simplest little thing you do and you having to do that to maintain a semblance of the sanity you have left. thus beginz your addiction. or for the sake of a real argument you have your daily routine be it your morning or night routine. am i correct? most people do. if you develop into being one of the people where if the slightest thing changez with your routine and your day is ruined you are an addict. you have become addicted to living a certain way and you don't like it any other way. you feel like the perfect little world the greatest schedule you have created for yourself is crumbling down as soon as the smallest part goes awry.

in all i will say there is a reason that we have become so obessessed over the most ridiculous thingz addicted to thingz that should have no sway in our livez. it is harsh but it is the truth-our livez have become that pathetic and uncharacteristic that we feel we need something to fill the void. and by attempting to fill that void we realize that the meager passes we make will not cut it so we obessess. we try and force it to occupy the emptiness inside of us while all it does it make us all that more aware of the hole.

My Poor Brain

Fivehigh

armzburninghandzshakingthismirroriamfacing

whywontitrevealtomethisbloodiamtasting

my body is stiff but itz ok. i hurt all over yet i invite it all the more. night after night i go through the same routine although it is never the same. maybe itz the place i'm in. constantly running over the same old ground i think i've worn the path into my feet rather the ground. i'm not the only one though with this problem. everywhere i look all the placez i go to the onez i turn to itz hopeless. itz like watching a bad sitcom on fucking replay. over and over and over and over and over and over sometimez itz the intentionz that change other timez the motionz. yet somehow, most people can't break out of a goddamn cycle. so help me i want to know when our brainz were replaced with microchips and our heart with oil pumpz. Individualism is an endangered species and itz fading fast. god forbid should one of us have a different opinion about something be it from our group or from a popular figure. you will be either cast out or bludgeoned until you relent often both. to hell with that i have an opinion and i'll be damned if you judge me for it. there is no one that has any right to judge. so to all you cynicz all thee unbelieverz the onez that dream and long for my downfall save a spot in hell for me.

hittheclutchswitchthegear

wearechangingdirectionsandthetimeisnear

we've become dependent dependent on too much bullshit. why cuz we bought into all the fuckin liez. you need this to be kool you have to buy this itz essential to your life how the motherfuck is an electric juicer essential to my life? sure squeezing the juice out of fruit is a pain but damn have we gotten lazy and dependent. we rely on faulty productz biased media and manufactured foodz to survive. is this living? seeing through anotherz eyez not taking thingz in for thineself? no it is some bullshit that the gd media has convinced us is the way to go so that we are safe and don't risk anything. to hell with it i'm gonna lay it all on the line with nothing to lose what do we have to gain?

Ain't It The Life

Fourthcoming

why do we accept their bullshit?
and never find things out for ourselvez
once again body worn eyez restless mind racing i find myself with thoughtz. thoughtz that i wish i could understand. the hopeless romantic the last of a dying kind i don't get it. why is it that we accept these so called love storiez in the entertainment knowing that it is not true yet we long for our livez to mirror? i have found love but because i am barely more than human at this point i fucked up. i nearly lost it completely. no my life is not a pretty fairy tale or a lovely story. i'm not even going to try and make it that. it is my life that i choose to live my way. we wait expecting thingz to just happen for us for our fairy godmotherz to come and grant our every whimz. this is the point at which i think we need a reality check. have we grown that out of touch that we long for something that cannot be? i am not condemning romanticism but simply pointing out that too often we expect what is not achievable. maybe i'm wrong that it is possible to have the perfect love story. i would be beyond thrilled to see it and to see success. until then i'm going to be more than i ever thought was possible and accept my namesake.
i have the infamy
notoriety is only a token more
what i long for is the peace
to see the end of the war
Disenchanted Lullaby

The Picture

drip, drop. watch it all slide down.

i want to paint a picture with this paint, such a vibrant and rich color. itz not right though. this crimson, though beautiful is not my cobalt. the sketch that livess in my mind, only one color rules supreme. such a deep, royal, heartwrenching shade. maybe, i can try and make it look right. moving my hands to the canvas, angling my wrist jus right i begin. a lil bit here, a dash there. maybe this line..............no. dammit no no no. what is this? this isn't what i wanted. this hurts, this is wrong. who's hand is that? why..i don't understand. the color matches perfectly, but the rose? it shouldn't be alone. it is never alone. not in......fuck. how did this happen? it should not have gone this way. now i can't stop it, and though the picture is gorgeous it shows all the emotions i didn't want. how does one even do this? itz.................the blood, the pain, the rose. it all comes together and now i see it.

who knew, someone so beautiful could be so ugly

who thought, a being so bright could dim itself

no believed, that there was so much more to the eye